Beset

That thing I did yesterday?
I did it again.
I’m sorry again.
Already today,
I’ve done it again.
I’m sorry again.
There’s a good chance that tomorrow,
I’ll do it again.
I’ll be sorry again.

Besetting sins: sins that we continually struggle with and have a weakness toward; vices that easily entangle us.

We all have besetting sins. Maybe it’s gossip or jealousy or telling white lies. It’s that same-old-same-old thing that gets us every time. We get weary of confessing it because we sound like a broken record and assume God is sick and tired of hearing it on repeat. We hover on the edge of hopelessness. When will we ever get some victory here?

I’ve got besetting sins. In fact, I have a list of ten of them in my prayer notebook. It’s not pretty. I don’t love it. But I have found a way to deal with the sins with which I am beset.

Every personality type has assets and liabilities. Since I’m a sucker for temperament tests, I’ve taken them all. Most of them reveal my preferences, how I like to do things and the areas in life where I thrive. The Enneagram is a little different. One of the insights it offers is a rundown of how each of the nine types function, both at its healthiest and its unhealthiest. Thus, my list of ten besetting sins. There were no surprises, but still, reading through the unhealthy character traits feels like a slap upside the head. Awareness is half the battle, though.

When I am at my healthiest, when I am the best version of myself, these are my strengths:

  • Wise and discerning
  • Realistic
  • Inspiring
  • Conscientious
  • Self-disciplined
  • Strong sense of right and wrong
  • Principled and fair
  • Responsible
  • Strong sense of higher purpose
  • Integrity

When I am at my unhealthiest, when I am the most surly version of myself, these are my weaknesses:

  • Critical
  • Fearful of mistakes
  • Perfectionism
  • Correcting/Nagging
  • Impatient
  • Self-righteous
  • Unemotional/Impersonal
  • Always right
  • Judgmental
  • Self-critical

This makes a perfect prayer list.
I confess the weaknesses that have entangled my heart.
I pray for the Spirit to beef up the strengths.

Dear God,
Let my weaknesses grow weaker
and my strengths grow stronger.
Amen.

For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize
with our weaknesses.
Heb. 4:15

My grace is sufficient for you,
for my power is made perfect in weakness.

2 Cor. 12:9

Coming Up: Pardon Me
Looking Back: True Confessions